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They/them

Granted, this debate only exists in the English language.   The French "vous" solves all the pronoun issues automatically, because it is already "they/them" which is kind of funny if you think about it.  The default of the French language makes no judgment about gender identity.

I thought this was all bullshit anyway when my youngest daughter made a valid argument, that the language had to change in the 1970s and 1980s when women began to take dominant roles in business.  I can only imagine how a crusty old 50-year-old feel about addressing women in the office politely instead of calling them "doll" or "baby" or "honey", and being vocal about their physical attributes (yes it was a real problem apparently).

The solution is simple, introduce a new gender-neutral pronoun.  The current solution that you should ask the person what is their preference is a great way to reduce interaction among strangers, because doing so, creates an impression about the interlocutor that you may not intend.  

I will be honest, the elbow bump instead of the handshake when someone is unwell, first took me by surprise but quickly realized how effective it was and made me re-think my behaviour.  Now I don't even think about it.  Only a few times have I had to explain it to some old geezer, and every time they looked at me in surprise and then said, that's a good idea!

Anyway, my daughter raised a fair argument on the they/them debate, but I still think that it's very clumsy and imperfect.


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